Yesterday, married Thin Tall Tony, aka, TTT got evicted from Big Brother Naija show. We all know why he was evicted. His game plan backfired at his face. In Nigeria, we take marriages seriously!
You can be sure this was how their conversation went last night.
Tony: My love
Wifey: Really? That’s what you’re going to say?
Tony: Haba it’s been a long time.
Wifey: Yeah, two long months.
Tony: How are you?
Wifey: I’m okay. How else do you think I am?
Tony: I know. I missed you too.
Tony: Bobo and Princess nko?
Wifey: They’re asleep.
Tony: I’ve really missed you guys.
Wifey: When did you actually miss us?
Tony: What do you mean?
Wifey: I’m just asking ni. When did you miss us, was it when Bisola gave you head or when you were chasing Tboss?
Tony: Ahan, but you know it was a game na!
Wifey: Tony please please. What kind of dirty game?
Tony: Honest babe. Shebi you saw when I was talking to Ebuka. None of it meant anything.
Wifey: Easy for you to say. The whole world saw you deny your family for this game of yours. You said all your family members are dead.
Tony: Ehn I just said that…
Wifey: Let me talk Tony! I’m the one that had to suffer all the insults from viewers. My friends whisper around me now. I know they talk about the rubbish husband I have that went to disgrace himself on Big Brother.
Wifey: Did you wait before stripping yourself naked the very first week? People were even pitying you at that point sef. Until you and Bisola started kissing. That was a game too abi?
Tony: It was my strategy…
Wifey: To win 25million abi? Oya where’s the money. Show me the money na.
Tony: But babe you know how these things go…
Wifey: Yes I know how it goes. When you’re around women the first thing you do is deny your family. Remember how I caught you with that actress? Your excuse was that you were rehearsing with her. This one you were doing on satellite tv, that one is rehearsal too abi?
Tony: True to God babe, the whole time I was in there, it was my family I was thinking of o!
Wifey: Tony it’s thunder that will fire that your mouth. ‘Bisola I want to knack you this night without condom…’ Shebi it’s your family that was on your mind when you said that?
Tony: Honestly I don’t even remember I said that. You know we were drinking and that just came out.
Wifey: Yeah whatever.
Tony: You don’t believe me? Sincerely it was part of my plan to win…
Wifey: But did you win? They offered you one million naira to quit. You refused.
Tony: It doesn’t matter that I didn’t win the actual prize money. My appearance alone will open doors.
Wifey: It needs to open doors to a new house. Me I can’t live in this compound anymore. Even our neighbour’s daughter calls you T-T Trash.
Tony: Ah darling, slow down. We can’t move just yet. You know I’ve been away since January and I’m only coming home with the Pay Porte clothes I was given. When they make me ambassador…
Wifey: So all the embarrassment you gave me was for jeans and T-shirt. Chai, I have suffered o!
Tony: Babe just relax. I can fix this. Just let me get home tomorrow. Okay?
Wifey: Be coming, or did I say you should not come? Just stop over your mothers house and pick the children. I’m going for a beauty pageant.
Tony: Babe babe listen. You’re a wife and mother . You can’t go and be exposing your marital body anywhere.
Wifey: Well that’s rich coming from you.
Tony: See I’m still your husband.
Wifey: Define husband.
Tony: Why are you fighting me?
Wifey: You think I have strength to fight? Abeg I dey go sleep.
Tony: Baby let’s sort this out now. I don’t want things to be weird when I get home.
Wifey: Oh things are already weird. Just check Twitter and see what people are saying about you. About us. Some even abuse me for supporting you still.
Tony: Don’t worry all will be well when I get there.
Wifey: Na so.
Tony: Wetin that one come mean now?!
Tony: Are you still there?
Tony: I love you babe.
Tony: I’ll see you soon.
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