Feminism is generally associated with gossip; this has been illustrated over-time in local dramas as well as in award winning movies. However, there are men who are worse off than women when it comes to relating information and spreading tales of events. As shocking as this is, the men even tend to divulge information about their sexual escapades in boastful bids. A social media user Vivian Adaze has hereby shared a very interesting perspective on the issue of “kiss and tell”. According to her, any guy who sleeps with a woman and tells every willing ear listening about his sexual encounter is “incredibly stupid” and shameless.
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Read her story below: Walking on the street that leads to my workshop, I stopped by my ‘customers’ shop to exchange pleasantries. We were still talking when a lady that sells ‘okpa’ came around to collect her money from those who bought but didn’t pay immediately. A particular guy started teasing her with subtle threats not to pay her. The drama became irritating and I asked my customer why he couldn’t just hand over the money to her so she could continue with her daily hustle. He smiled and said ‘he had slept with her’ “What has that got to do with anything..,” I asked? “You won’t understand. He slept with her and told his friends about it. Everybody here knows he slept with her.. I’m sure others have taken their rounds to sleep with her.” “Why are you telling me this? What will this information do in my life? He slept with her… and so” “Don’t you know her dignity and honor as a lady has been shattered??” At this point I was visibly annoyed… Which dignity? So having consensual sex with a fellow adult will reduce a lady’s dignity while that of the man would stay intact. You are a lady. If it is public knowledge that a man slept with you, it is a thing of shame. See ehn, if I have sex with a man and he decides to tell the whole street that he had sex with me, it wouldn’t faze me a bit. I would make sure I walk the street each day with head held high. If there is anything that would shame me at this stage of my life, it ain’t sex.. I told him and continued with my journey visibly annoyed. ……
Guys, if you practice Kiss and tell, You are indescribably stupid. If you feel it is okay to tell your friends that you had sex with a girl in a bid to shame her, you are still stupid. Ladies, there is nothing to be ashamed of if the sex was consensual. I’m not advocating you sleep with whoever comes your way, but if you do decide and its consensual, there is still nothing to be ashamed of. Your honor and dignity isn’t lost simply because you had sex. Who started this bullshit? It is sad living in a society where a lady is shamed and made an object of ridicule simply because she had sex with another who somehow find covering from societal tags and labels. The lady becomes the one with the lost honor and dignity while the other participating party is left off the hook because of his gender. This is the society we live in and it is still sad that a whole lot will defend this ridiculousness. Do you agree with her?
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